(Image: Paul McDevitt)
Feedback is our weekly column of bizarre stories, implausible advertising claims, confusing instructions and more
A mind-bending law looms
RECREATIONAL drugs have strange effects on people, most notably those trying to ban them. The UK government intends to outlaw “legal highs”, the synthetic analogues designed to sidestep existing prohibition. Feedback has studied the text of the , and noted many others wondering if the document was itself written under the influence. It bans “any substance which is capable of producing a psychoactive effect in a person who consumes it, and is not an exempted substance”. Such effects include “stimulating or depressing the person’s central nervous system” to affect their “mental functioning or emotional state”. Clearer heads point out that this is effectively a ban on almost everything.
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Guy Cox writes to assuage Martin Albu’s concerns that his biodegradable membership card will “last a lifetime”: “I’m biodegradable and will last a lifetime, and I hope the same applies to him.”
Getting high on hi-fi
THE above bill covers things that may “enter the person’s body in any way”. Will this be its legacy, as with the Criminal Justice Act 1994, now known mostly for declaring that “‘music’ includes sounds wholly or predominantly characterised by the emission of a succession of repetitive beats”?
Lengthening list of the bans
WRITING on , Ian Dunt lists some common items that will be consigned to amnesty bins outside police stations, should the legislation pass unadulterated: e-cigarettes, incense, helium, eye drops and breath mints. Barrister Tim O’Conner notes that air is not an exempted substance. It can affect the central nervous system, as scuba divers know. He “your government is proposing to make air illegal.” Brian Paddick added “perfumes that evoke a sense of well-being or romance”. Can Feedback readers suggest substances that will not be banned?
Make mine a superposed shandy
WE ARE directed by Simon Darvell to the comments appended to the above mentioned article. One points out that alcoholic drinks are exempt if they “do not contain any psychoactive substance”. All psychoactive substances are prohibited ingredients. Alcohol is psychoactive. So “the exemption applies only to drinks that simultaneously do and do not contain alcohol.” “I’ll have a pint of Schrödinger’s,” says Darvell.
No dry drink in a wet state
PERHAPS a solution to legal confusion over alcoholic drinks is powdered alcohol, a substance recently banned by Ohio legislators (13 June). Chris Townsend writes that this is of interest to hikers and campers, and points out that dehydrated drink . It is highly flammable, which Chris says “could be very useful for wild camping… with powdered alcohol you’d have a fuel source for brew-ups and a tot of alcohol to add to your tea or coffee. Perfect!” Feedback thinks camping with Townsend could be very wild indeed.
Ban makes boom in Ireland
IN MARCH, the architect of the “legal highs” ban, Theresa May, that an expert panel was looking into the effects of a similar ban on recreational drugs in Ireland, which began in 2010. Apparently the “impact has been significant,” and has included the closure of many “head shops”.
George Murkin of Transform, a charity that campaigns for the legal regulation of drugs, that one of those significant impacts is that Ireland than any other country in the EU. Well done! Trebles all round!
A Lord on the Dark Net
WRITING in The Times newspaper, decides that the only way to dissuade people from using these drugs “is to give us all detailed information on the downsides of legal highs” – which they might get from the doomed head shops but, Kamlesh Patel , they will not get from online sellers.
Bad heir day
EARLY in June we got to see , including one urging his mother’s Britannic government to increase funding for what he called “integrated healthcare”. By that he turned out to mean, largely, homeopathy. A colleague pointed out that the euphemism was not new: the Royal London Homeopathic Hospital, not far from our office, in 2010 the “Royal London Hospital for Integrated Medicine”. How could we have missed that? We now look forward to some sideways-thinking university vice-chancellor setting up a “Department of Integrated Logic”, which will promote findings which are true and findings which are false on an equal footing.
Peruvian productivity push
RETURNING to drugs with ingredients: the war on them is going strong. Hajo Buter directs us to , which reports that a record 6.7 million tonnes of cocaine was seized by Peruvian authorities last August. “It seems Peru is amazingly productive,” writes Hajo. “How did they carry and weigh, let alone grow, this amount?”
Moan over Alabama
FINALLY, yet another famous Peruvian export could disappear from shelves in Alabama. Last year, senators there a to counter synthetic drugs. The 400 compounds it names include 5-hydroxytryptamine (5-HT), more commonly known as serotonin. “5-HT has been found to exist in plants, fruit, vegetables and chocolate,” . “Will those now be controlled substances? Will there be police raids at your local supermarket?” Feedback is concerned this may be the end for the banana in Alabama.