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The strange case of a jam-cream quantum superposition

Feedback is our weekly column of bizarre stories, implausible advertising claims, confusing instructions and more

Quantum jam

Quantum effects are rare in the macroscopic world. Things, if you’ll pardon the technical language, tend to be one thing or another, but seldom both at the same time. Otherwise you might wind up with logical inconsistencies, such as, to pick a random example, a national lockdown that people feel free to violate.

Another such mind-bender comes courtesy of retailer Marks & Spencer. “What comes first – jam or cream?” it asked in a tweet featuring a selection of summery scones. “Now you don’t have to choose thanks to our new strawberry-flavoured clotted cream.”

Undisturbed superposition of this kind is a beautiful thing to behold, but the true enormity of this product launch does not lie therein. At a time when people are more divided than ever, it is extremely moving to see something that anyone, regardless of age or background, can wrinkle their nose up at in disgust.

Fake the jewels

It is never particularly dignified to admit to an attack of schadenfreude. This is why Feedback will, instead, insist that we take absolutely no joy from the misfortune we are about to relate.

According to an article in The Times, a group of armed robbers hijacked a van carrying £500,000 worth of jewellery, . The criminals allegedly had inside information, which is why they struck when the van was so richly laden.

The only flaw in their cunning, devilishly well-executed plan is that their haul consisted entirely of costume jewellery, with the real swag left behind.

Two feet apart

continues to be top of Feedback’s mind, as does the proliferation of unusual techniques designed to ensure people remain the statutory distance apart.

The latest such innovation comes from the town of Cluj in Romania, where a cobbler has designed shoes so elongated that they make physical proximity practically impossible.

The prolonged pandemic pumps, so Reuters informs us, come in the equivalent of a European size 75, and need almost 1 square metre of material to produce. The effect is, perhaps, more vaudeville clown than hygiene-minded dandy, but given Feedback’s own wardrobe choices, who are we to disapprove.

Far, far away

On the subject of social distancing, thank you to Barney Herring for pointing out that “safe social spacing is best maintained at a distance of 65 attoparsecs”.

This distance is alternatively expressed as 20 giga-angstroms, around 13 pico-astronomical units or 10¹¹ yotta-Planck lengths.

Let them equate

Time now for a story of unusually pronounced whimsy that begins with cartoonist Tom Gauld, whose regular contributions to New Scientist are among the highlights of any reader experience. Some weeks back, he used his cartoon to draw parallels between the detailed stratigraphic layers of, well, stratigraphic layers and those of elaborate biscuit-based desserts.

This prompted one particularly talented reader to actually , consisting of – and we report this with difficulty while salivating – raspberry coulis, chocolate ganache, blackberry chocolate mousse and coffee sugar syrup.

No free samples made their way to Feedback, alas, but given our chronic pandemic overeating, that is probably just as well.

As we and our colleagues united around the virtual water cooler to rhapsodise about these baked geological teaching aids, a source pointed us in the direction of yet more appetising scientific cakery.

It appears that the Nanophotonics Centre at the University of Cambridge mandates adherence to a mathematical identity that, as it appears , runs as follows: “Publication=cake.” Directly below this equation is a quasi-infinite scroll of scientifically accurate confectionery, ranging from optically nano-welding brownies to photocatalytic shortbread.

Let us know if you are aware of any other inhabitants of this viennoiserie Venn diagram.

Slice up the pi

In a recent column (30 May), Feedback cast an approving eye over a deliberately inefficient scheme to calculate the value of pi. This inspired George Masin to write in with the following observation: “If asked to give the value of pi in a space allowing only 7 characters, you would probably give 3.14159, but a slightly more accurate value can be given by specifying the division 355/113.”

Throwing down the gauntlet to fellow pificionados, he goes on to ask: “Are there cases where a division using more characters gives pi to a greater accuracy than the number of characters used to represent the division?” Please send your suggestions to the usual address.

What’s in a name?

Oh go on, have another helping of nominative determinism why don’t you, we all know it’s why you are here. Gather round and say hello to New York ICU doctor Rob Gore and ecological consultant Laurie Wildwood.

Got a story for Feedback?

You can send stories to Feedback by email at feedback@newscientist.com. Please include your home address. This week’s and past Feedbacks can be seen on our website.

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